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September 23, 2003

Gan Shula Newsletter

Table Of Contents
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(1) Afterthoughts
(2) How it Began
(3) The wheels keep Rolling
(4) Introducing.......
(5) Nishbar, Gala Gala
(6) From Dusk Till Dawn
(7) Does it Come in Pink?
Kalinka Mia
(6) Public Intoxication
(7) Good Will Hunting

Afterthoughts
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Well, before i even start to tell you what has been through me in the last couple of days, I'll just tell you what i feel right now; it seems more important. It feels so strange to go around at the street and not to look behind your shoulder for the security people, it so strange to drive in the street without police escort, and it is really strange to have to stop at red lights. It seems that after just two days of living as a celebrity, i got used to the idea. i can't help it...

How it Began
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Well, Shimon Peres decided to have an 80th birthday party, a big celebration and they wanted some volunteers; of course i decided to go, with the help of Shlomit, who promised me it would be fun. I got assigned to assist two people, Mr. Rau (the president of the federal republic of Germany) and Mr. Piech (owner of Porsche and chairman of Volkswagen or something like that).

The wheels keep Rolling
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I had to be at the Dan Hotel at Tel-Aviv on sunday, 08:00 for briefing. i found my first person, Mr. Piech, which didn't seem to need much of my help, so i left him with his friends and started to mingle until the other person i need to escort came. The first event was the laying of a corner stone for the Peres Center for Peace building. it's located in Jaffa in front of the Sea, with one of the best views in Israel. now these thoughts came to my head... this place is so good, why was it left barren until now, and then, after looking to my left, i saw that it has an old muslim burial ground next to it, and the conclusion followed, it was one too, and like the old muslim tradition, after a 100 years you can build on it. expect something strange to go there...

Introducing.......
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After the corner stone ceremony there were some other things to do, a board members meeting of the Peres board of governors and other stuff, but i decided to go to Jerusalem to meet my President and the Israeli president. i hopped on the bus, followed by security and many other businessman and politicians. We were on the Way to Mr. Katzav, two students and fifty old people all with ambitions for Politics. the cocktail started around 17:00 and was due to end around 18:00 so we can get back to the Gala dinner. during this cocktail (which i believe was my 7th of that day) i met a few presidents of several countries that i believe to be of great importance, the most important one was Rau, that didn't seem to need all of my Attention.

Nishbar - Gala Gala
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After our visit to Mr. Katzav, we went to the Mann Auditorium in Tel Aviv (better known as "Heichal Hatarbout") for the Gala evening in honor of Mr. Peres (Shimi); attendants and participants: William J. Clinton, Ariel Sharon, Sharon Ayalon & Yoav, Rita & Rami, My Mom, several other presidents and nevermind.... the good thing about it was that i got to sit at the first row. the funny thing that night was something like this: i was walking with one of the other students accompanying me, a blonde girl originating from the former republic known as the soviet union. we talked and i told her that i have a ticket for the party that will be held later that night and she asked me how did i get my ticket, i laughed and told her that i have a talent to swallow semen; the reply i got was even funnier, she said that she does too, so i told her that we should get together sometime and check it (way2go!!!) and the reply i got from her was somewhat indicating of her stupid origin. she said "The last guy who got that privilege was 1000 times more a man than you" so i asked who it was... her answer is written in the form of a multiple choice one, try to guess who she talked about, i'll supply the answer at the bottom of the Email.
(A) Shimon Peres
(B) Bibi Nethanyahu
(C) Haim Revivo
(D) Dudu Topaz.

From Dusk Till Dawn
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The Gala evening ended around 23:00 and i was due to go out before all the security, join Mr. Rau and move to the party of Mr. Meiman, but, i didn't get to do that, i had to try and force myself on one of the buses but in the end i quit and went to the cats for a drink. i drank some Alc and went home, cause i had to wake up at 05:30 cause i needed to be back in the hotel at 07:00. the funny thing is that when i got to the hotel at 06:48 it was so empty, cause every one was still asleep from last night. around 08:30 everything came into life and we went to a panel at the Tel Aviv University.

Does it Come in Pink?
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There were 4 panels at the conference and i was supposed to attend all of them, instead i mingled and talked to several people that were interesting and made some good contacts in the israeli and global politics. the other thing i did that made me laugh all day was to escort the groups of children that were there from different schools and make them admire me.. i even got a picture with two little girls (18 or something) nevermind.

Kalinka Mia
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After the conference, we had a party to celebrate the fact that there is no more work to do in reference to Peres, so we all started to dance, then Peres and Gorbachev started their speeches and afterwards came the interesting part, Gorbachev and Peres started to sing old Russian folk songs (Kalinka Mia and stuff) and were joined by an Arabic Drummer. you can say that you never had fun until you saw two people that are over 80 sing and dance.

Public Intoxication
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In order to make everyone happier faster, i decided to bring a bottle of vodka or something, so i went up to the lobby and asked them for a bottle, they said i`ll have to pay and i said that there's now problem, and almost took out my credit card when she said "500 Nis not including VAT" and i looked at the 50Nis bottle of smirnoff next to me and laughed... i went back downstairs without the bottle and decided to intoxicate everyone in a different way. i took the priceless bottles of champagne that were there and opened them, started to go through all the people and just force feed them with alcohol. after 5-6 champagne bottles, all the people started to look happier and dance, we kept on dancing until 24:00, then i went home to crash.

Good Will Hunting
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With all of my good will, i can just say one thing, this was the _Best_ two days of my life and i`ll do it any other day if needed. i love this politics thing. all i need to do now is get into public office

Regards (no messages today)
--
Jonathan J. Klinger

נכתב על ידי jk ביום\שעה September 23, 2003 03:26 PM